Some people mustn't have any boundaries because people are always going a step to far. Some things shouldn't be possible like finding enjoyment within another one's pain. I can admit to being guilty to suck things like walking in on someone without them noticing then making a sound to give them what seem to me a laughable jump. We never really think about the other half until after it's over.
I am speaking from current experiences right now. I can be immensely disturbed sometimes that it will bring me to tears within a few seconds of replay. Just now I learned the vision of someone else's blood touching me brings my body reason to become rigid and my lungs to hyperventilate. Maybe now I should begin to keep brown bags near the side of my bed. One subject I have always been neurotic about is that of disfigured people. I could care less if that makes me a cold and heartless person and if people think I should trip and become disfigured myself because it is the honest to goodness truth. My mind has decided The Hunch Back of Notre Dame is to blame for this point of weakness. I literally cannot look at movies like Elephant Man or any kind of documentary about such things like the Bark Person. Why is it even acceptable to give people these inhumane names anyway. I feel somewhat bad referring to some one like that, but I don't know there actual names. It seems as if I am writing about some kind of freak show that I have seen before all I am missing is the infamous Breaded Lady. I can handle her. The instant bringer of mental scrutiny is the harlequin disease. It is the most distressing thing I have ever seen. I saw a picture of fetus with that disease for about five second and I started to cry instantly. I still want to mewl of the thought of that dreadful thing and even after the sincere expression of my emotions my blood sharing tormentor regardlessly chooses to jeopardize my well being with threats of these terrifying images.
What is a sense of humor and how are you even supposed to know when you have gone to far when your own moral compass doesn't even exist? Unfortunately, I don't have all the answers so I suppose my door will be locked for a little while longer tonight and my therapeutic candle with be lit tonight as well.
